Stories
Posted in Stories on January 22, 2012
Definition: an attractive girl covering up her beauty either to avoid attention or for practical reasons (Tom Torero)
When I chased after and stopped the Hungarian model that I’m seeing at the moment, one cold, dark bootcamp in December, the students and I had little idea of what was underneath her multi-layered “disguise”….a fur hood of a long coat pulled up around her face, ear phones in, head down and texting, walking super fast. Only her height, feminine walk and heels gave it away.
After dating her, I discovered that this eskimo look was not just to keep out the cold. She told me it was also a way of avoiding “chat-up” attempts that come thick and fast if she uncovers too much…wolf whistles, monkey noises, stares, “you so hot baby, gimme number darling” comments.
As a model she says that she, like other models, make a conscious decision to “hide” her beauty. Here’s how she looks underneath the disguise…
Ironically, however, this gives the daygame direct stop even more power than normal as they are so blown away by the boldness and confidence shown if a man bypasses these “no” signals and pulls off a calm conversation. She wasn’t easy to hook, but once she saw that I meant business (by using John’s technique of holding their hand) she became like a little kitten.
Another form of a Hidden Hottie is an attractive girl who is not showing her beauty because of the clothes she’s wearing for a practical purpose: a tourist, a waitress etc. I remember a French girl I stopped in Trafalgar Square who was wearing a rain coat, wellies and a rucksack. I could see she had a pretty face, but it was only in the cafe on the instant date when I realised that she was a stunning ballet dancer with a body to die for.
So, the moral of the story? In the daytime you sometimes have to look more closely than you would in a club for beauty. You can be pleasantly surprised!
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on December 7, 2011
External Interrupt: An abrupt change in the internal dynamics of a set, often caused by someone else’s arrival
It can happen to all of us, not just in a bar or club but during street daygame too. You’re happily bantering with a girl you’ve just stopped when from out of the blue appears her friend (or friends!). Even harsher, you’re on an instant date or a day2 when her phone goes off and it’s her friend saying she’s on her way and will come and join you.
Do you: a) get annoyed and go for a hasty close / getaway? b) stick in there and pretend nothing’s happened, ploughing on with the girl but ignoring the interruption? c) embrace the new dynamics and use them to your advantage?
It’s so tempting to end up going for a) or b), which is what I’ve often done, especially if the “interrupt” looks like hard work or there’s more than one. But in the last few weeks I’ve had quite a few interruptions which I’ve decided to embrace and bring them on board, turning a normal set into a grand set where I’ve had more chance to display my sociability and value, making the number stronger.
Last week I stopped a Latvian girl in Piccadilly Circus and the set was going well. Low and behold, after 5 minutes, her two friends came to join her from inside a store. Now, the golden rule with interruptions is to focus your attention onto them immediately. Add some extra positivity and friendliness, and it will be impossible for them to “reject” you. By showing your social skills and calibration extend to more than just a 1-on-1 conversation, and by winning over her friends, she’ll feel even more attracted to you. Having her friends tell her to give you her number and setting you up on a date is the icing on the cake! That’s what happened with the Latvian. By the end of the set, it was like we were all old friends.
Tonight I went on an instant date with an American girl for coffee. 10 minutes into the date, her phone goes off and she invites her friend to join us. Again, I decided to win over the friend as soon as possible, actually creating an old-skool jealousy plotline and getting attraction from them both.
So, the moral of the story? Embrace the interruptions, whatever they may be. Use them to your advantage, to display even more of your warm positive win-win vibe.
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on November 11, 2011
By popular demand, I thought I’d share with you a typical week’s worth of numbers/responses/dates so guys get a realistic picture of what goes on. The old saying “you’ve got to be in it to win it” is certainly true, and we should never forget the probability aspect of daygame. If you want to close, you have to open.
Saturday: Taught a bootcamp with Jon in central London from 12-8pm and number closed 2 girls as demo sets. One hot Swiss girl (replied to my texts) and one Lithuanian (added me on Facebook but nothing since). Went on a date with a Slovak girl in the evening and ended up at hers.
Sunday: Second day of the bootcamp. Closed an English girl while warming up (she flaked) and then 3 girls as demos for the students. One Italian (date set up over text), one Russian (chatting on Facebook) and one French girl (replied and then vanished). Early night.
Monday: Number closed an English girl coming out of the tube. She has a boyfriend but seems keen over texts. Went out with Swiss girl from Saturday and went as far as kissing her in a bar.
Tuesday: Instant dated a French girl for coffee. Number closed her but she wrote a strange text after saying she was going back to France. Recorded podcast with Andy, Yad, Jon and Mini.
Wednesday: Number closed a Scottish girl and an Italian. Both replied but the Scottish girl seems more on. Went out with friends.
Thursday: Went on a date with the enigmatic French girl from Sunday. Drinks then back to hers for fooling around, not home base yet.
Friday: Got a possible date with the Italian, she’s not confirmed it yet….
As you can see, it’s a mishmash of numbers, flakes, dates and adventures, with a large dollop of randomness thrown in. Sure, you can perfect your skill level on the street for stopping and number closing, but there are so many variables involved regarding getting her on a date. Once she’s out with me, I feel like I’m on safe ground, but there are still things out of your control. I’ve learnt to relax about this randomness in game, as there’s always ups and downs, wins and losses. The moral of this story…..embrace fluctuations and realise that the more numbers and instant dates you get, the more things will happen. It’s basic maths!
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on October 27, 2011
Australia, Austria, Brazil, Bulgaria, Canada, Chile, China, Czech Republic, France, Germany, Great Britain, Greece, Hungary, Italy, Japan, Latvia, Lithuania, Macedonia, Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Poland, Romania, Russia, Slovakia, Sweden, Turkey, Uganda, Ukraine, United States….30 down, 50 countries to go!
I know – a notches on the bedpost silly statistic, but it shows you how international daygame can be in London. As Andy says in this video, the street is the greatest venue for meeting women in the world….no bouncers, no admission, no real competition, no closing hours. You can own it, and “travel without moving!”
I get lots of emails from guys asking if daygame only works on “lost tourists or foreigners in search of fun.” Not at all. This year I have slept with five English girls who I’ve stopped on the street….a student, a posh estate agent, a footballer from Chelsea Ladies FC, a secretary and a dancer. There’s no difference – you just need to be a bit quicker off the mark in the initial stop when making assumptions, as you don’t have the topic of their contrasting country to fall back on.
A tip with English girls is to be extra creative with the dates you take them on. I don’t mean investing in terms of cocktails, swanky clubs etc. I mean do fun things that they wouldn’t have tried, even though they live here and might know London well. Find quirky coffee shops (try Joe and the Juice off Oxford Circus) or go for Bubble Tea (Soho). Ride Boris bikes in Hyde Park or climb Primrose Hill. Just avoid the standard pub / Starbucks route, or even worse, dinner and a film. Showing your passion for London is essential, as it’s so easy to fall into the typical “let’s-moan-about-London” frame. Same if you live in New York, or Sydney, or Paris. Seek out the hidden gems in your city and use them to get you and the girl in an adventure bubble, without ever leaving your city.
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on October 23, 2011
Great first day of filming today with our daygame.com camerman Martin, in glorious autumnal London sun. We were out to film a date I had with a long-legged foxy Italian for a forthcoming dating project. Andres (my wing, good friend and dating master) came along to check the wireless microphone and put me off by making douchebag faces in the distance.
We headed down to the Southbank where I had a coffee with the girl as Martin and Andres stalked me from a nearby location. I was also filming the date with a spy camera inside my watch, a la Bond. We had set out to capture the ComfortBubble phase of our dating model, and that’s exactly what we got…she happily talked her way into a sea of investment about her passions, dreams, ambitions and travels; it was textbook stuff, and all on film!
“What a big watch you have, Mr Bond…”
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on October 16, 2011
Picture the scene: you and your buddy decide that a night out on the town is in order. You hit the first pub, down a couple of pints and scan the place for girls to approach. You’re still not feeling it, as everyone’s in groups and none of the girls take your fancy. Next you try a club where it’s £10 on the door and filled with other guys who’ve got the same idea as you. There are girls about, but the noise, competition and dynamics make conversation hard, let alone number closing. You and your mate end up leaning against the bar deciding to just get drunk instead. It’s 2.00am and you’re £40 down on the night bus, home alone.
I know…it’s a stereotype, but that was my experience of night game until last year, when I discovered that cold approaching in bars and clubs was not the way to go about it. It dawned on me that if I could stop girls on the street and instant date them, then I could do the same in the night (Owl Game, or “Gutter Game” as I’ve heard it called!) and take them to clubs, in big groups. I was effectively becoming a promotor, but with real skills of stopping, building attraction and rapport and building up a large network of numbers. Either I could game girls during the week for it or take them straight off the street.
With my friend Rob (Beckster) I started promoting for the big name high-end clubs in London using my daygame skills to feed into his nightgame skills. It’s been win-win ever since, as the clubs get girls, the girls get a free night out, and we get the magical effects of pre-selection and entourage. No cold approaches needed, just lean back and wait for them to come to you.
Last night was a fun example of this. I had street stopped and number closed a university student a few months back and she was up for a night out. I told her to bring her female friends, and she rounded up 10 of them! Rob and I also gathered up some girls from the street just before, so we ended up walking into the club with 16 girls. We sat them at our table, poured them drinks and let the good times roll. Lots of the daygame.com team were there to celebrate the forthcoming Blueprint launch and it was a mad night which ended up with me losing my keys, bank cards and waking up in a Student Halls of Residence 10 miles away.
A previous night out. All the girls in the photo I had met separately on the street and brought together for some entourage magic!
So, the moral of the story…don’t just see daygame as a way of collecting phone numbers and going on dates. You’ve got a skill that ever club owner in the country desires, so why not use it for win-win purposes?! You’ll never have to cold approach at night again.
P.S. Check out Andy’s ninja stopping method here to learn the easiest way to stop a girl in the street. Works like magic!
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on October 14, 2011
Oh dear, oh dear….Andy should never have left his laptop open while he’s out on the sunny streets doing a cheeky bit of daygame! I’ve been pressing all sorts of buttons and stumbled upon the Blog, which I thought I’d have a tinker with.
There’s so much going on here at Daygame HQ it’s hard to know where to start. Everyone’s buzzing about the completion of Blueprint….even my mum is thinking of signing up to see my beautiful face in High Definition. Every time I come into the place there’s a random happy gathering of visitors from afar; film crews for Norway, photographers from France, Yad playing Fifa 12 (again!).
The last few months have been crazy busy with bootcamps, teaching, travelling and speaking, not to mention a nice collection of lay reports and random encounters. Jon and I have taught bootcamps in London and Oslo with some awesome students. Scandinavia was off the scale – we didn’t have to teach much of the assumption bridge section of the model as nearly every set hooked. On our second night in Oslo we managed three street-to-house bouncebacks in a row (one of the girls was an FHM model, I kid you not)….it was either the power of Jon’s sandwich making or the fact that Norwegian girls are so relaxed and open-minded! The chilled vibe was just perfect for our style of low-investment street game, we’ve both made promises to go back as often as possible. Saying that, I never want to go on a date with a girl dressed in a banana costume again (check out this video if you want to hear more) or sleep in a sauna.
Speaking at the Morten Hake Summit with Johnny Soporno and Zan Perrion was cool. After my talk a young guy came up to tell me he enjoyed the talk. We went outside for a coffee break and just at that moment a hot blonde walked past. I smiled, he smiled, I nudged him, and off he went for his first ever stop. Five minutes later he returned, beaming and clutching his phone. His first ever close from a cold approach, with half of the summit guys watching across the street.
This summer I travelled to Slovakia and Hungary to continue my quest “for the perfect vibe.” Ironically I slept with neither a Slovak or a Hungarian….in Bratislava I ended up with a German girl in my hostel and in Budapest I went back to a Russian girl’s hotel after meeting her in a club. Tom Torero doing night game….shhhh, keep it a secret. Out of the two, I’d recommend Hungary as a daygame location. The women are hotter, more feline, more striking. The vibe is more open and relaxed, and the capital city just beautiful.
I love it when old numbers which you thought had died come to life again months down the line. There must be something in the stars as in the last few weeks I’ve had success with a few girls who I street number closed up to a year ago. The first was an 18 year old Swiss student who I took out for a drink in June and never heard from again. She came back to London last weekend and sealed the deal. An English girl I street number closed in March texted me to say that her and nine female friends want to come out tomorrow night to a club that Andy, Yad and I are going to…..should be enough to go round. There was also a French girl who I street number closed and instant dated from last Christmas who is coming over for dinner tonight. Never say never!
In each blog post I do I want to give one piece of practical advice for all you fellow daygamers out there, as I know that’s what I used to look for. So, without further ado, today is all about Less Is More. Remember that the person talking is the person investing, so as soon as you’ve got the girl to hook after complimenting her and making statements, dial down your energy and input. Same thing on dates – get her to do the work. The more she talks, the more a bubble forms around both of you. Good daygame is not about being entertaining or funny, it’s about being authentic and calm.
Enough ramblings for one day. Andy will be back soon and I’m in danger of pressing a button and deleting the whole website. Hmmm, now let me see…
- Tom Torero
Posted in Stories on August 24, 2011
Want To see Tom Torero speak at Morten Hake Summit 2011? Goto www.mortenhakesummit.com
Posted in Stories on May 2, 2010
I used to go to the gym all the time, but, as always, life got in the way and after moving flat I failed to keep it up.
Anyway, I moved to Covent Garden in January so I could work full-time on daygame.com, and as luck would have it there is an awesome gym pretty much next door to where I live. As soon as I moved in I told myself “I’m going to joing that gym in a few days”.
A few days passed and I told myself “I’ve got to film content today and wrote those articles so I can’t do it today. Next week. I’ll join it next week.”
Next week came and I told myself “I’ve got that podcast to organise, and more articles to write, and I’m teaching. I’ll DEFINITELY do it next week”.
Another week passed and I just kept coming up with excuses as to why I couldn’t go RIGHT NOW.
If I’m honest, it was the same thing that keeps guys from going out practicing daygame.
The problem was, sat on my coach with my laptop…. I was comfortable. And that gym with all those weights and huge muscly men just seemed daunting.
Read the rest of this entry »
